If there is one thing I've learned about dating, it's that ex-boyfriends never truly go away.
Despite thinking you'll never hear from them again, you ALWAYS do. They disappear for a period, only to re-emerge out of the woodwork at the most inopportune times.
Sometimes it's a random text while out with your new fox, other times it's a weird comment on a Facebook picture or, my personal favorite, a birthday email asking you "what's new?" a year after they dumped you.
What are they even doing in the woodwork while they wait for you to partially move on before striking? Whittling chess pieces?
Confirmed - Ex-boyfriends and cockroaches will be the only two specimens to survive a nuclear attack.
